But, alas, a Rose

Today is a day celebrated by many couples, avoided by an even greater number of single people and laughed at by children.

Valentines Day, really? It's almost if St. Valentines had nothing better to do but create yet another celebration for people who are in a relationship and laugh at people who are less fortunate or perhaps prefer to be single. Sure, it's a very "romantic" day where many people dream to share this designated day with their special other half, but the necessity? Hardly necessary.

• The Day You Asked Me Out
• The Day We First Went Out

These two would be the first of many things to celebrate in a relationship, no? In some more extreme cases:

• The Day We First Kissed
• The Day You Bought Me a Present
• The Day You Met My Parents
• The Day I Met Your Parents
• The Day You Bought Me A Pet
• Our Pet's Birthday
• Engagement Day
• Wedding Day

However, all is well if every single one of those celebrations are forgotten (except maybe wedding anniversary, that's kind of important), so long as Valentines Day is remembered. Why? Because this is the one and only day that everybody knows, one that everyone should be able to relate to.

This post shall be dedicated to what you should and shouldn't do on this wonderful day of martyrdom, forced sacrifice, love and romance.


Recommended Course(s) of Action(s)

Have already made plans prior to the night before, or in more extreme cases, before the day would just be good. 
This is mainly for the guys for various reasons. For starters, which girl out there would want to be the one to plan their valentines day? Somethings just shouldn't need to be said; in fact, some things, if said, would render the occurrence pointless and meaningless.

Purchase your respective partner a present, preferably before the day.
Exchanging gifts is the most publicly enjoyed sport in dating or just general partnership. Whether you hold a secret disgust towards your partner's sense of fashion or perhaps you dislike their old bag or wallet, gift would solve the problem. Gifts, is the most subtle form of communication in a relationship, whereby an invisible statement (mutually agreed upon) is written: you must hereby use the gift presented to you by your partner as an act of love if it will not violate any human rights or cause the user any physical or psychological harm.

Purchase flowers and/or chocolate for the day.

Once again, mainly for the male population. Self-explanatory, just uh...don't buy her flowers that you generally see at a cemetery...especially white or yellow roses.
 

Unrecommended Course(s) of Action(s)

Arrive extremely late to the date.
Extremely late meaning more than 5 minutes. Really, don't do it. Unless you're a female, in which it automatically becomes "ok" because as gentlemen, we're supposed to have chivalry.

Dress sloppy.

My girl actually asked me what she should wear today, and like most girls, she just wanted me to succumb to her desire to dress sloppy. Conversation went like this:

GF: What should I wear tomorrow?
Pui: A dress.
GF: What kind of dress?
Pui: A nice dress.
GF: What about jeans?
Pui: That's not a dress.
GF: And a T-shirt.
Pui: ...
GF: Can I come in my PJs?

Seriously girls, why do you even ask for our opinion?

Give your partner expectations.

Although most would disagree with me, think about it this way. It's much easier to impress someone when they have no expectations at all.

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Of course, the above were only a set of recommended guidelines and unless you're completely at a loss, you should not take any of them with a large degree of seriousness.

In closing, I would like to inform all couples that modern day valentines day is the result of consumerism and giving you an extra day to celebrate would only be beneficial for the restaurants, card stores, gift shop, florists and ultimately the Government which takes up all those taxes so jokes on you (and apparently me too). Raise awareness to the single people out there that there aren't more couples that magically appear on valentines day and also plenty if not more single people around too; so to all those who avoid this day instead of exploiting the weakness in other single people, jokes on you. Lastly, damn you children watching from the side bench and laughing, soon you'll be dragged into this vortex of Valentines Day.

-Pui.x

Cuz baby I'm home sick.

Casual meetings. A grey and sensitive area when it's a one-on-one meeting with the opposite sex. For a more clear picture on why this is the case, let's break it down into sections.

Section 1: The Build Up

With today's technology, a majority of us, the youth, prefer contact via the means of Instant Messaging. Our first problem. Intended tones such as sarcasm are almost impossible to detect, so what do you say to make sure...for the sake of this guide, let's call them subjects. So what do you say to make sure said subject does not feel like you're flirting with them? It's not easy.

You: So it's a nice day today.
Subject: Yes it is.
You: So wanna go get drinks?

Perfect example that demonstrates someone who just wants sex.

You: So it's been a while.
Subject: Yeah it has...a year now?
You: Yeah, hey remember when we use to date?
Subject: Uh...sure...
You: Wanna get drinks?

There is no good way to do it without making it weird and awkward. Mind the exaggerated examples of course. But then, you do get stumped over. Which brings us to the next part...

Section 2: The Location

Where is a suitable place for 2 people who are not on a date to meet up without generating suspicions? I have prepared a list of places that are suitable for such a small amount of people and would likely pop up when arranging a one on one meeting.

• The Park
• The Bar
• The Cafe
• The Mall
• Over Lunch
• Over Dinner
• ETC.

Obviously, there are more to add to the list and the list by itself would appear to be innocent. However, if the 2 individuals that were meeting up were not both single, and in the worse case scenario, both in a committed relationship, red lights suddenly pop over the list. Let's have a closer examination at what go on in the subject's thoughts in a few of the locations aforementioned.

The Bar.
Female: Does he want me drunk?
Male: This will get interesting

Over Dinner
Female: This isn't anything serious right?
Male: Is she hitting on me?

The Mall
Female: Ah shopping.
Male: Why the hell do we want to go to the mall?

Suddenly, the list of locations that appear to be safe become much shorter.

• Over Lunch
• Cafe

Section 3: The Meet Up

So from personal experience, in order to avoid embarrassment and misunderstanding, precise arrangements and minimal communication works best.

Pui: Hey, we haven't seen in ages.
Subject: Yeah like a whole year now.
Pui: Cool, we should catch up sometime, over coffee/lunch?
Subject: Sounds good, how have you been?
Pui: Hey I got to go, how about next week? K cya.

So why minimal communication prior? It's so you can save all the talking in the meet up. You've arranged for a meeting and you have a few hours to kill with conversation. You can't bet that your amazing life is as amusing to you as it is to them so save every last drop of topic. If you don't listen to this advice...well...

You: So the other day I tripped and almost died.
Subject: You said that already
You: and then I almost got hit by a car the next day.
Subject: You said that already
You: blah blah blah
Subject: Said that.

...it becomes a little awkward.

You: So how's the weather?
Subject: Weather like.

Section 4: Dress Code

Whether the other sections went smoothly or not, they will not be able to cause the same horrid impact as this section. Don't believe me? Think about it now. You're going to meet up with a friend from the opposite sex that you haven't seen in a long period of time (Over 10 months), they have a partner and you do not wish them to think you are hitting on them. How do you dress? Let's begin with male attire:

• Formal Wear
• Smart Casual/Semi-formal Wear
• Stylish Casual Wear
• Casual Wear
• Hobo Wear

I'm sure most of you would agree that Hobo Wear and Formal Wear should come off immediately leaving Smart Casual, Stylish Casual and Casual. If you wear smart casual wear, would the subject think you're over dressing? If you wear stylish casual, would the subject think you're gay? If you wear casual wear, would the subject think you're slack?  As the subject's old friend, I hope you know their personality and your own to pick out the most fitting attire.

For females, it's a little bit more complicated. Firstly we have a similar list as above:

• Formal Wear
• Smart Casual/Semi-formal Wear
• Stylish Casual Wear
  
• Casual Wear
  
• Hobo Wear

And then we have the next part:

• Dresses
• Skirts
• Jeans
• Tights
• Stockings
• Short-shorts
• Heels
• Flats
• Boots

And then some might take a look at this list:

• Padded
• Push-up
• Nude

And finally:

• Low Cut
• High Cut
• Revealing one shoulder
• Strapless
• Low cut at the back
• Exposes the back
• Length of skirt/shorts

As I am no expert on female clothing, girls, I just hope you know how to unravel that list and put together  your outfit. Or if you can, help me out here to complete this guide.

-Pui.x